What am I afraid of? Regret, waking up one day and realizing that life has passed me by, and I didn’t do any of the things I said I wanted to. That’s what moves me, that thought inspires me to try. I did not always feel this way.
One day I woke up and went out for brunch with a friend and I realized just how much time had passed me by. I stopped showing up, stopped living, I was just existing in isolation. Maneuvering life outside of my home felt impossible. It seemed everything and everyone was moving on except me. Just being out made me realize I had anxiety witnessing movement- it became foreign to me, and I didn’t even notice. I felt behind in just about every area you can think of from fashion, relationships, social media, music, trends, and creating- but what shook me to my core was how behind I felt in my thoughts. My thoughts weren’t evolving anymore they were at rest in my complacency.
I understand we all have our lane and personal timeline, but witnessing life ebb and flow for others helped awaken me to see that time was moving, but I was not moving with it. Fear was stagnating me mentally and physically. I said loudly to myself NO MORE, I’m tired of feeling sorry for myself. I’m tired of letting rejection shut me in, I’m tired of letting failure define me. I’m tired of shying away from the BIG things.
The truth is, I am worth the big dreams that continuously grow and replay in my head picking up the intensity every go-round, like a hurricane crossing warm waters. Now is the time to take that storm outside of my head and personify it. I declare that I am the force to be reckoned with.
Fear is scary, and uncomfortable and can even be debilitating if you let it, but fear can be positive if you change your perspective of it. Fear is a clear indication that there is something that excites you, that there’s something you are moving toward that you have never seen before, yet believe it’s possible. Fear pushes you towards your faith and the moment that fear meets faith is life-changing!
I don’t believe fear can fully be eradicated some nerves are meant to stay and for that reason, you must learn to function with them. Let it catapult you forward instead of confining you in the cage of complacency.
I am packing fear in my suitcase and moving along anyway. I’m choosing to believe that better is out there in every way possible. I am working toward it. I am making room for it. I will welcome it as it comes. And I will continue progressing, understanding that this continuous journey is the destination. You only fail once you stop trying.
Do it afraid, Don’t give up, Keep going. That’s it, that’s the message.
Simply Janeen ❤